Positive Language Tag

IMG_7314"Be positive!" "Have a positive attitude." We hear phrases and quotes all the time encouraging us to be more positive.  Deep down inside, we know that being positive is always better for our soul, actions and outcomes, but sometimes it's very hard to keep an upbeat demeanor. I was recently asked, "How can I be positive when so many bad things are happening in my life?"  To which I answered that being positive doesn't mean that you constantly have a huge, fake clown smile on your face or are bounding with enthusiasm when you don't feel it in your heart. Rather, it means you have a genuine feeling of optimism and block as much negativity from your experiences as possible.  Heading in this direction invites positivity, in people, in conversation, in results and more, into your life.
Thumbs Up, Thumbs DownWhen you listen to others’ conversations, it’s amazing how much negative content there is. Many people use pessimistic, sometimes downright mean words as a matter of course. They complain. They express worry constantly. They judge and criticize. You can do better than that. In fact you need to if you’re going to be happy and have happy relationships. If your words are full of bile, your thoughts must be just as dark. What’s the point in that? If you’re thinking and speaking about bad things all day, you will be miserable. And you don’t need to be. Words and thoughts are things we can choose. They’re among the few things we have control over so get a handle on them now.
Laakea Eating CakeOne PR Fix, or communication upgrade, that I learned at the beginning of my career, is to replace using the word "but" with "and" to soften unfavorable language.  While this has come in handy in business, it's also been useful in my personal communication as well. Before I learned this, I never really considered how the terms "but," "however," or "yet" can actually be negative.  When I stopped to think about it, I realized that they are mainly used in contrary to something and have a subtle way to bring down a conversation.  Why?  Because many times, "but" is used as an excuse or a crutch.  Over and over people use "but" to take the accountability off of their shoulders.  For example, "I did my homework, BUT I don't have it with me because my dog ate it." Or "I would have been on time, BUT I got stuck in traffic."  Even though this is not the case for all uses of "but," the frequency of  using a "but statement" as a justification for a mistake has dirtied the interpretation of the word.